Thinking Aloud

To start from part one, click here.

Some of you are saying, “I want to go in new directions but I don’t know how to move on from the past.” I’ve read your comments. All of them.

In the Meaningful Memories post many of you mentioned it was hard to find even one good memory. I left a comment for you too…

“For those of you who said it can be hard to find a happy memory… you are so right. Hurt seems to stay right there on the surface. Digging through it to the joy takes a lot of work! I am sorry for the heartache you’ve endured.

I wish I could take each ‘little girl in you’ in my arms today. I would set you on my lap, look into your beautiful eyes, and tell you…

‘This is never how God intended it to be. You are loved, chosen, cherished, wanted, of great worth, and you will amount to MUCH in His Kingdom.’ ”

We live in a fallen world. None of our stories are as they should be, some more than others. I wish I could make healing happen right here, right now. As you already know, it’s a journey far more complicated than a blog post.

As I thought of you, my eyes drifted to my bookshelf. And I want to share several books that have helped in my personal healing…

Making Peace with Your Past by H. Norman Wright

Recovering from Losses in Life by H. Norman Wright

Changes that Heal by Dr. Henry Cloud

Life’s Healing Choices by John Baker

Breaking Free by Beth Moore

Rain on Me by Holley Gerth

(I wrote this book out of my ongoing journey of loss. It’s about healing in the middle of the storm, even if you don’t know when blue skies are coming.)

Whether your hurts are recent (like mine) or from many years ago, God cares.

It’s a bit of a cliché but still too true not to say…

He really does want to transform our history into HIS STORY.

Today the next S.T.E.P. for all of us is just whispering a ten word prayer, “A little more healing, Lord, a little more healing today….”

I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland…so my chosen people can be refreshed. – God, Isaiah 43

** If the hurts in your history are interfering with your daily life I would encourage you to seek out a trusted counselor. (I have several times!)

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TODAY’S QUESTION:
What has helped bring healing to your history?

Purpleclick:
What helps bring healing?
People, mostly women, who really come alongside you, and who are not trying to “fix” you.

I remember a special retreat conducted by a group of ladies (girlfriends) from USA. They call their ministry “Destiny Women”. We had sessions of charting our journey from birth, identifying lies,  rhythm of rest and discovering God’s purposes for our lives. We had rich experiences like worship dance, soaking (warm spa pillows wrap our neck & shoulders and warm basin of water for our feet, with worship music in the background) and healing prayers.

I learnt to embrace more of my womanhood and know that I am “not there yet”. I was more aware of the process of finding my unique role, the only place I can fill… what’s “just my size”. And as I look back on my evaluation notes where I wrote my action S.T.E.P.s,… it is lining up with what I’m discovering through this challenge with you, Holley!

I have to mention though that what speaks to my heart is that these Destiny girlfriends have also “not arrived”… (they are in their 50s and 60s) and are still going through… well, life, with all its twists and turns! And in the same way, Holley, your blog (words) is very healing because you let us know you are also still very much “on the journey” with us. Thank you.

(February 03,  2010 at 08:46 PM)

Holley’s Prayer:
Lord, I thank you for gathering your daughters on these pages today.
As I read their words, I feel your love for them–
the way you ache when they do, the way you rejoice as they heal.
God, sometimes this life is just hard.
And yet you meet us in those places too…
turn our ashes into beauty,
joy into mourning,
gently and with such tenderness.
We do pray for continued healing in our lives,
a little more each day,
and for new opportunities to share that healing with others.
You are our HOPE, our Redeemer,
the One who holds our hearts in His hands.
We are safe with you,
not in the way the world thinks of it…that nothing hard will ever come,
but rather a much deeper, wilder safe
that says though the storms beat against the house it will not fall
because its foundation is upon the Rock.
So we stand tall, beloved, beautiful,
glad to be your daughters, trusting in you for today,
hoping in your for tomorrow,
surrendering ourselves to you always.
Amen.

A new year… and new beginnings. I am quite excited by how God has put in place a few things that He has laid on my heart… but it’s not possible to say it all at once and besides some are still work in progress.

So here’s segment one… on new blogs!

Blog #1
Heart To Heart with Holley http://blog.dayspring.com/

I started getting a devotional email from Dayspring.com at the beginning of the year.
I liked and was inspired by what and how Holley Garth wrote, and looked forward to reading the blog.

There was a turning point on 21 Jan 2010′s post, titled “How are you really?”, because Holley opened up on how keeping the blog was getting pretty tough for her. She writes: “It makes me think about things I don’t really want to right now and feel things I haven’t felt in awhile.”

Down the road a little, she has presented a 21-Day Challenge, for herself and her readers, where she’ll post every day from 26 Jan, and each post will include a little question to answer.

Blog #2
Thinking Aloud http://purpleclick.crusade.sg/

I’ve taken up Holley’s challenge, and have been transferring her posts and sharing my answers to the questions at my personal ministry blog (which is this one you’re at).

I’m learning to share my musings through this blog (partly by reading how Holley does it) and I’d love to hear your answers to Holley’s questions too.

What especially encourages me is that Holley herself reads my blog and leaves a couple of comments too. Wow-hoo!

Blog #3
Together http://ementors.crusade.sg

(Hee hee… I drew inspiration for the title from a recent Mandarin serial on Singapore TV, which is a familiar childhood jiggle, “The More We Get Together”.)

When I was at the MinistryNet conference Oct 2009, I was encouraged by a session on Mobilizing Volunteers, that I was doing some things well and also challenged to work on some areas.

It is upon my heart to build greater community among the group of e-mentors serving in Singapore. And though we are a tiny island and it’s best to meet face-to-face, it’s not always possible to accommodate everyone’s schedules! But since we are an internet ministry… we should make the most of the technology!

The blog already has several posts with content from e-mentor updates sent out from as early as 2006, as well as recent ones with links to new e-mentor sign-ups, 2009 statistics, etc. It was good for me as I do this, to see and be reminded how the ministry has matured and the faithfulness of God in the people writing in and the people serving.

I’m still in the process of uploading stuff and learning how to get the site to be better, and would appreciate your patience and prayers for me! You can also contribute to the blog… that’s even if you are not an e-mentor… yet!

Blog #4
Sincerely Yours?

If you have a blog I don’t know about, please let me know it’s whereabouts. If you want to start a blog… that would be really wonderful!

>>> Download the PDF version: PurpleClick Jan’10

As an old year draws to a close and the new year begins, it’s a time to reflect on God’s goodness throughout the year, with a heart of thanksgiving.

Using the themes of Worship, Healing, Friendship and Joy , I’m thankful for…

Worship
- The opportunities to serve in my church through design work, camp and Christmas High Tea.
- The choir at my sister’s church and singing with them throughout this year for Easter, Missions Month and Christmas.

Healing
- God’s protection over my step-brother earlier this year. And recently, my niece who fell at home on 3 Dec and fractured her elbow, that it wasn’t more serious. Her cast was removed on 29 Dec. (See story below.) Praying for God’s constant protection over our loved ones.

Friendship
- Those who have given towards my needs and prayed for me. I appreciate you!
- The time spent visiting with friends in USA, Canada and Turkey.
- The time re-connecting with friends, former schoolmates (some of you, yeah!) & disciples and Sunday School students.

Joy
- Partnerships/conferences with various staff and fellow believers – Internet Evangelism Day, MinistryNet, “Journey To Journal” poem book, Making the Gospel Click newsletters (MGC). In particular at MinistryNet, I was encouraged that I was doing some things well, and also challenged to try new ways to connect with people online.
- Having written to more than 2000 people as an e-mentor since Nov 2005.
- Meeting with existing and new e-mentors individually and in small groups.
- Meeting with e-contacts… most recently, the 15-year-old boy who received Christ on 25 Sept. Praise God for his friends and teacher who have impacted his life, and that he was able to attend church with his friend over the Christmas period.

Some e-mentors have mentioned it is hard to tell how genuine the contacts are who “prayed to receive Christ” since there are so many and most do not reply. But my philosophy is this: (adapted from the Back Street Boys): “I don’t care who you are, where you’re from, what you did, as long as you wrote in…” because you never know if that one is indeed genuine!

Making the Gospel Click…
The latest issue features the volunteers in our various components, and a couple of the e-mentors share their experiences.  Read all about it here.

Last but not least…
When I had a sleep-over with my niece, I asked if she wanted me to make casts for her dolls’ elbows as well. The answer was “Yes!” (Of course!) I used tissue paper and her Princess sticky tape for the tiny casts… one was for a Polly Pocket doll only about 5 cm tall.

I guess having the dolls in casts was my way of helping her to know that others can identify with her pain.

It reminded me of how important it is for us to know that God identifies with our pain.
“He was despised and rejected by men; a man of sorrows, and acquainted with grief.” Isaiah 53:3

As we enter a new year, may the love and grace of God give us a quiet assurance that He is already there and all ready to take care of us.

Blessings!

>>> Download the PDF version : PurpleClick Dec’09

To start from part one, click here.

I’m saying something scandalous…

You don’t have to have goals.

In fact, I think they sometimes distract from what matters most.

Disclaimer: If goals work for you and fit with who God made you, go for it!

For the rest of us, let’s talk about Directions.

What if we said, “My heart says God is asking me to go in the direction of ______________ (being healthier, writing a book, changing jobs, etc.)”? Then we can figure out S.T.E.P.s to go there.

Suddenly it’s about the journey rather than the destination. And that gives us more room to follow God’s leading. On the way to the Promised Land the Israelites “traveled and camped wherever the Lord told them to go.” The most important part wasn’t getting there… it was obedience.

I love this verse from Proverbs, “The way of the righteous is like the first gleam of dawn, which shines ever brighter until the full light of day.” There’s always going to be more growth, change, ground to cover, story to be written.

Sometimes we have the illusion that we can arrive. Shocker: We can’t this side of heaven. Embracing that lets us receive grace and celebrate where we are now — loved, accepted, and well on our way.

Life, and our story, is a journey.

Let’s ask God for directions.

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TODAY’S QUESTION: 
What’s one “direction” you’d like to go in?

Purpleclick:
Dear Holley,
I love you! “It’s perfectly OK not to have goals!!!” Thank you for saying it and putting it in “black and white”! How freeing! My mind can think better already.

And think I did… and many pieces fell into place today for me. The journey didn’t start with your blog and challenge, but what a special part it has to play in my “direction”.

My “direction” is towards ministering to ladies, especially friends I’ve known for a long time, or friends I click with instantly like we’ve know each other for a long time. Ladies have special needs. I know because I am one. God has been bringing a few of us together in recent months, and there is resonance in our hearts.

Definitely there will be a creative project in this “direction”. I will not go into it now… because it’s still brewing. Stay in touch and we’ll see what the Lord has in store! Cheers!

(February 02, 2010 at 02.29AM)

Purpleclick: (a little later…)
I see a number of the ladies sharing about writing a book. I have a dear friend from design school, Kylee, who’s now become the “Publishing Queen”. She gave a talk on self book-publishing at a women’s expo in Sydney recently. I’ve put the 2 parts of the YouTube videos below. Enjoy and be inspired!

Part One
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8xbtFd7TcI

Part Two
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0DAwd4GoMPE

Holley: (in response to a post by Becky)
Dear Becky, I’m so sorry you’re upset. You are already going in the direction God has for you right now…and that is healing. When you’re grieving a loss, as you are, that’s all you need to do. The rest will come with time.

That you have already taken such a big step is amazing! Be proud of yourself, give yourself lots of grace, and know that God dearly loves you and will hold your hand (and heart) and walk with you step-by-step. You’re doing great and you’re already on your way.

Thank you for your comment. It also made me realize my original question was too big and vague so I updated it. Appreciate you!

Praying for all of you this morning…